Overheard: The course of true love and cycling...

There would have been a time when, in choosing where to sit in a cafe, I would've gone with a table that was quiet and not too close to anyone else. But that was before I realised the entertainment and inspiration which eavesdropping on conversations brings!

Now I make a beeline for an empty table that's adjacent to a group of chatting people ... listening-in makes such a lovely accompaniment to a cuppa.

Here's part of a conversation between three male students I overheard in the Student Union Café in 2008. I'm afraid I've chickened out and given you the edited highlights of the discussion as it was punctuated with the kind of things you might expect 3 young males to be talking about .....and I don't want to offend anyone.

If you're happy to use your imagination ... then one of them compared his situation to that of a ship going down after hitting an iceberg, which inspired a great yet filthy pun from another. Meanwhile another relayed a story about a trick they played on a boy at school who ended up waiting outside Sainsbury's for ...for something unspeakable to happen ...

You'll have to finish those for yourselves ... !

Anyway .... here's the bits I'm happy to share in mixed company:

The students were discussing the whether one of them should contact his estranged girlfriend:

The Agony Uncle: Please don’t. I wouldn’t be your friend if I didn’t say anything. Go and see a film at the weekend. Don’t just sit and dwell on it.

Estranged + Confused: I went round to see her and she put Hollyoaks Late on! [pause] Which was f#!%ing good though … but how’s that more important than this situation?

[I was with him on this one - I'm not sure when watching Hollyoaks Late could be more important than any situation short of it being your last request on death row.... ]

The Philosopher: This is not life is it?

Estranged + Confused: Nah.

The Philosopher: It makes me wanna sing a Creed song.

It was at this especially heavy moment [!] that one of them changed the subject to something less emotionally taxing ...

Agony Uncle: Have you ever caught your cobblers on a crossbar?

... and all the while I desperately tried not to give myself away by spraying my mouthful of tea everywhere in incredulity ....

Jx